WARNING: the first person to leave "but it's a dry heat" in my comments will be shot. And you know who I'm talking to don't you? Yes, you.
People weren't designed to live in Arizona. Cacti were. One day all of our air conditioning units will breakdown and it'll be a Western version of The Day of the Triffids....you heard it here first!
The difficulty is, I don't like hot weather. Whenever we used to book holidays I'd be the one arguing for Rhyl, the Peak District, Northern Italy, Denmark etc. Mr Devyne would be the one arguing for the South of France, Southern Italy and Egypt. I'm the one who loves chilly, wet walks followed by lying in front of the fire with hot cocoa. He's the one who loves sunbathing by the pool with an Arnold Palmer.
And now I'm living in Arizona! And trust me, I'm honestly trying not to moan.
But today's September 2nd and all week it's been 110F and above, peaking at 112F yesterday (44.4C). In fact, it's been 100+ since May. And although I'm TONS more used to the heat than I was this time last year, you still can't get things done in this heat.
What I wouldn't give for some of this stuff:
Oh rain, how I miss you...and I mean real, proper, cold rain. Not this hot, sandy stuff we get during the monsoon. Everybody altogether now shout "HABOOB!" (just because it sounds funny). Ah, that relieved a little tension.
I tweeted yesterday that I've really had enough now.....it's time for the summer to clear off and beautiful autumn/fall to arrive and someone tweeted back "I'm jealous".
I can understand this - I can see that many people would like to have temperatures in the 100s, 110s etc for a while but having this oppressive heat day after day after day means:
- the kids can't have recesses (school playtimes) - the local education authority makes a decision each day on whether it's safe to let the kids outside - out of the 35 days they've been at school so far, only 5 of those have they NOT had 'red alert days' where they have to stay inside. And kids with pent up, unspent energy - they're pains in the evening, much as I love them. Just think of how kids are in the UK when they can't go out day after day because of rain....it's the same.
- I just can't get stuff done. My sprinkler system broke this week. I can spend time indoors with the air con on researching valve manifolds, male and female threading (its not rude, trust me), slip vs. threaded adapters etc......but sooner or later I have to venture out and try and fix the thing properly. This has been my view for the last few days:
Yes, I'm quite aware there's a valve missing. That's my problem, a mega leak. And the system has been so botched in the past I'm finding it almost impossible to get parts to fit the incredibly tight space it has to all fit in.
And you see that damp bit of earth in the middle there. That isn't damp because of the leak - nope, all the water that was there originally dried up within 20 minutes in the 112F/44C degree heat yesterday. That damp patch is HONESTLY my sweat whilst I knelt over the hole before taking the photo trying desperately to get the darn valve and adapters back in. It was running off me like Gazza's tears. And this was despite me setting up a parasol to give me shade:
To make matters worse, I'm being a total nesher/scaredy cat doing all of this because when I first started dealing with the leak a few days ago, a huge scorpion (ok about 2 inches/5cm long) crawled out of the space I'd had my hand in for about 15 minutes.....AND I'm having to do all of this whilst avoiding puncturing myself on this stupidly positioned cactus:
Who plants a cactus right next to the sprinkler system valve manifold box?? Not us, it was previous owners. I'm constantly on edge about puncturing my arm if I get to close to it or having my hand punctured by another well-hidden scorpion.
Sorry I really am moaning aren't I? I'll shut up soon. Please bear with me, I'm finding this rant quite cathartic.
Anyway, I can't work in these conditions. It's too darn hot. I know its going to cost us an arm and a leg to have someone professional out to fix it, but the weather just isn't being my friend. 112F is probably fine if all you have to do is sit by a pool, but if you have to try and carry on with 'normal' life, eg.
- sitting in a baking hot car on the school run,
- trying to keep a garden under control that's growing at stupid fast rate because of the monsoon followed by heat,
- trying to fix a broken sprinkler system to cope with the less hardy planting,
- even walking to and from shops with weekly food shopping....
It's TOO hot.
And I want Autumn/Fall NOW! And I look at British autumnal fashions and layering, and mustards, and emeralds, the rubies and wines, and knitted scarves and gloves, and thick beautifully colourful high denier tights with TOTAL envy......
Oh well, mustn't grumble.
I apologise for my rant.
I can't help it, I'm British you see. And I'm hot. And not in a sexy way. In a sweaty, drippy, clammy way. Yuk.
Normal service and chirpiness might return next week....I'm told we might be lucky and get down to 107F/42C....